……..So criticism should go out of our mind but appreciation should be practiced: appreciation of others’ children, appreciation of other people is very important but that doesn’t mean that you appreciate all others and torture your wife or torture your husband – that also is an imbalance. First responsibility is your family but you should appreciate others. And this comes when you have no jealousies about anyone. This jealousy, I don’t know from where it comes, so I don’t know this quality of jealousy, whythere is jealousy.
So, also if you have jealousy you have to use it for the right purpose, and what is the right purpose is that you should be jealous of a person who is spiritually higher than you, and you practice it that you become better. If jealousy is for competition, then you compete with the person who is more compassionate, more loving, more sacrificing, more patient. So this competition becomes a very healthy competition and the collectivity becomes very nourished……..
Now the worst enemy of collectivity is aggressiveness. Some people are basically aggressive; their style of talking is extremely aggressive, the way they say things is aggressive. May be because anything, may be they are better educated, may be they come from a very aggressive family, may be they are having a kind of a superiority complex or an inferiority complex or a sense of insecurity, or maybe they are possessed.They try to dominate and show their very strong feelings towards people – of superiority. They may be inferior, it’s not necessary, but they do and this is something is to be curbed. So what you have to practice here is humility. Try to be humble………
(An extract from talk of H H Shri Mataji Nirmala devi on Virata Puja. Melbourne ,Australia, 10 April 1991)